Every single time I felt that buzz, every time I got a new message, my worry deepened. One after another, all seemingly bad news.

I felt another vibration and snuck the phone halfway out of my pocket. It was another text from JB.

“And then, if needed, I would obviously seduce her. Which would lead to Prong Eleven, which I am too much of a gentleman to explain. So, that’s the gist of the plan. You know me, I always have a plan; but without JB here to be a worry wart all the time, I feel like I can improvise a bit more. Really test my skills as an undefeated lead detective, you know?”

I don’t think that I have ever ridden my bike so hard and so fast in my entire life. I made it to the club in just under nine minutes. I had only a couple minutes to spare so I looked around quickly, trying to determine the best spot. The most obvious one. The fool-proof one.

I helped Beej take a seat on the cold tile floor, his anxiety getting the better of him once more. He was covered in sweat, like he had been pedaling a bike for miles. Or been to a male strip club.

I lost track of time a bit when I was playing my game. Even though Snake is a relatively simple game, it still requires a lot of focus and sharp reflexes. I had set a pretty decent high score, one I was sure my dad wouldn’t be able to beat for a long time, when I noticed that the yard was quiet. A little too quiet. 

“Now, there are a lot of criminal types out there, but there are three main categories of pants snatchers. You ready for them?”

“Oh my god! I think I’m gonna be sick!” Jimmy spit the words out like they were the most bitter things he had ever tasted. He shook his head sadly, grimacing as he did so. He sighed heavily, then pulled out a couple small notepads from his pocket and flipped through them until he found the one he wanted. He put the rest of them back in his pocket and grabbed the pen that was tucked into the spirals of the pad and ready to go. The notepad he had chosen had a picture of a cow on it, wearing a dunce cap and eating hay. It said Udder Madness underneath the picture. “This is the notepad I use when the cases make no sense,” he informed us somberly.

Transcribed word for word from audio recording. Fifth session, snippet of last tape. Notes added to show emphasis or mood where needed by Stephanie Rahl, BA of Stenography.

Transcribed word for word from audio recording. Third session, beginning of first tape. Notes added to show emphasis or mood where needed by Stephanie Rahl, BA of Stenography.